It's more a metaphor than anything else, but since you ask - I did at one time have a husband who felt my clothing and shoes were a direct reflection on him. He did have some power over me, yes, but because there have been changes in the world, when I called the police to have him removed from the premises (his attitude about minor things like shoes extended to much more menacing things), their power was stronger than his.
Thirty years ago they wouldn't have been so helpful. In some parts of town, they still aren't.
Of course the fact that I don't give a damn is reflective of changes in the world. As a nearly 50-year-old single woman, I do not have "snagging a husband" on my to-do list, because I can keep a roof over my own head and people are not always trying to fix me up. They understand that I've done the marriage thing, am not interested in doing it again, and they let me live my life.
Forty years ago? I don't think so.
An even better example:
When I was a young woman I worked for a software firm. All the female employees (programmers and systems people) were in one room, and the male employees referred to that room as "the gorilla pit." Why? Because the "gentlemen" in the firm didn't find those women attractive. Fortunately at the time I hired on space was not available in the "pit," so the new female employees invaded the guy space, and eventually the 'pit' became a thing of the past...but it took awhile.
Times have changed and I doubt very much that a name like "the gorilla pit" would be allowed now. But if you don't think that's a kind of power, you're fooling yourself.
Finally, to be honest, I don't think it's possible to "convince someone to give up power over you." People in power aren't inclined to do that. You have to make your own power, so that you can find or build an environment that has other values. And I've done my best to do that.
