Capitol Hill Blue
Posted By: Jeffery J. Haas "Mom, I think it's a boy." - 01/08/20 02:57 AM
Nathan attempts to prepare a turkey.

Posted By: TatumAH Re: "Mom, I think it's a boy." - 11/24/21 11:57 PM

Tofurky: What the Hell Is It?


Quote
But if it's not a turkey, then what the hell is it?


Well, it's a whole lot of things. The company behind the vegan holiday roast doesn't make it too easy to get to its ingredients list online -- once you finally find the page that describes the Tofurky feast, the tab linking to the nutrition information is really really tiny. Maybe they're shy because the word "gluten" has become almost profane these days, and it's right at the top of the list:

Ingredients: ROAST: Water, vital wheat gluten, organic tofu (filtered water, organic whole soybeans, magnesium chloride, calcium chloride), expeller pressed non-genetically engineered canola oil, natural vegetarian flavors, shoyu soy sauce (water, non-genetically engineered soybeans, wheat, salt, culture), non-genetically engineered corn starch, white bean flour, garbanzo bean flour, lemon juice from concentrate, onion, carrots, celery, salt, calcium lactate from beets.
Quote
Inside the glutenous Tofurky exterior is the stuffing, which is composed primarily of a blend of rice, whole wheat bread, flour, evaporated cane juice (a sweetener), organic palm oil, carrots and celery.

​The "feast" package contains the stuffed roast, a pack of "giblet" gravy (made with a whole wheat flour base), a vegan chocolate cake dessert from Amy's, and, get this, Tofurky Jurky Wishstix, a replacement for the turkey wishbone and the associated pulling-apart and wish-making ritual, also made primarily of gluten

I have been encouraging my Vegan friends to not be so wishy washy in their diets, and embrace the "eat it raw" Vegan movement! I supply them with recipes for raw three bean salad, with the admonition that canned beans are unacceptable as they are quite cooked and no longer Vital!
The raw soaked beans are, however, very Vital and lively! grin

TAT
Posted By: Ken Condon Re: "Mom, I think it's a boy." - 11/25/21 12:29 AM
Heysus Crisco!

Raw soaked beans? Talk about bowels in an uproar and no one light a match!
Posted By: pondering_it_all Re: "Mom, I think it's a boy." - 11/25/21 04:17 AM
Symphony in obfuscation! "evaporated cane juice " also known as "raw sugar".

Some of these "vegan" things are decidedly unhealthy. I'm an omnivore, but I think I'd rather eat peas and beets, than a faux "hamburger patty" made from peas and beets. And melt a little of that lactated lipid fraction on them, please.
Posted By: TatumAH Re: "Mom, I think it's a boy." - 11/25/21 04:37 AM
Posted By: Ken Condon Re: "Mom, I think it's a boy." - 12/07/21 08:56 PM
So anyway I thought I would insert this little joke from a long while ago that we heard growing up in Hawaii. Today is December 7th which for anyone who was born and raised there is a date that is totally burned into our brains. Way more so than 9-11 but I’m talking about my generation… “people try to put us down”

No, that is not it. Here it is, And I warn you it is not PC by today’s standards although I still find it to be humorous.

Two sailors were standing aboard a battleship in Pearl Harbor the morning of December 7. It was a cool morning by Hawaiian standards and it was still early as the sun was just rising…..in more ways than one. One sailor said to the other….

”You know, there’s a little nip in the air.”
© ReaderRant