Capitol Hill Blue Forums Life and Moral Issues Issues of Aging Memory Loss

I may have posted some of this before. If so - apologies. Oh, I recently turned 86. I have a neurosurgeon that the VA has me going to. I see him about every year and a half. He asks me a bunch of questions and gives me tests and sends me on my way after I ask him questions about what is going on.

My dad's wife once told me that my dad had Alzheimer's. At the time there wasn't really anybody in town who was competent to actually diagnose that so I sent both of them up to Seattle to get tested. She was fine and my dad had memory problems. At the end he didn't really even know where he was or who he was but there was no dementia. After I got tested I was told that I was not a candidate for Alzheimer but I did have some memory problems. Since then (about 5 years ago) my memory problems have become more defined so I thought I would pass on some of the stuff I now know about.

My problem with my memory has more to do with my memory span than my actual memory. What happens is that I can no longer deal with multiple things. I used to be able to balance several conversations at the same time, for instance. That is no longer the case. If I am talking to somebody, and somebody interrupts me, I will likely forget my stream of thought and have no clue what I was talking about! If anybody is having something like this going on its NOT Alzheimer! As far as I know there is really no solution to this one and is what it is. The best plan is to understand what is going on and proceed with your life! I also checked for existing stuff being sold for memory. The most popular is Prevagin. If you google it you will find out that there is no basis for the claims made by this one and doesn't really help. Those that think it does are deluded (sorry). Fish oil may help and may not but there is a lot more studies with that than Prevagin.

My personal view is that the trick is to understand what is going on then get advise as to how to deal with it. For myself I have found that just almost understanding what I am dealing with has been half the problem. I can no longer deal with interruptions, for instance. If I get interrupted whatever I was doing is forgotten, pure and simple. I also have serious speech aphasia (forgetting words). This one is constant and frustrating. If you have access to something like google you can ask and chances are you will find the missing word! I also have no problem remembering things in the past, say, 40 or 50 years which I have always wondered why and about.

Anyway, I thought I would throw this in for those of you who might be aging with minor problems. Oh, you will also learn that to say "where was I" more and more as time goes on (I also remember a song by that name!)

Sleep apnea is a big factor in member loss. Just saying.

I use google multiple times a day to look up word spelling or the names I block on. I do remember what I'm looking for, but the name escapes me temporarily. The way I look at it, is that computers are more and more auxiliary storage for my brain. Fine with me. I have experienced tons of stuff not worth primary memory storage. Secondary storage (like google) is fine.

I think a lot of the American public is going to be doing that more and more in the future. So many people have brain problems from Long Covid now, it's sad. This may be one of the most common symptoms, and most of these victims had asymptomatic cases. So they may not even be aware they had it. It's not like young athletes who can't run up and down the soccer pitch for a whole game any more.

I can still do Level 6 Sodokus, so my logic is working fine. Taking 3.5 mg Melatonin every night, so I'm getting a lot more sleep than I used to. But I have to google for "Melatonin" every time I want to name it! Maybe it's just swiss cheese brain from my MS.

My bipap machine deals with that

Welcome! What you are talking about is (again) Speech Aphasia. Its not gonna get better. If you are not used to it yet you will be! Just one of them things.

Then there is tennitus. As far as I can tell there is no cure but it really doesn't interfere with hearing its just one of them things you can get used to. Its kinda interesting. There are a pile of the famous who also have it.

I'm so deaf I can't hear the tinnitus anymore.

Can't tell you how often I open a new tab to Google something and forget what I was gonna Google...

But I smoke a lot of weed.

First tinnitus, that really doesn't have much to do with hearing - folks just assume that is the case as it seems it does. You can google that one.

When you start to do something, and then forget you what you were going to do its not that you forgot what you were doing. What happened is that you lost your train of thought because you were somehow interrupted. This is something that happens when you get older - you can no longer do several things at the same time and you are blaming your memory. All being said, however, it really makes no difference.

A few years ago I bought myself a digital voice recorder and carry it everyplace. If I see, hear, or think of something that I want to remember I tell my recorder and, later, it tells me what I recorded. That works for me. Digital voice recorders are cheap. Lots of them on EBAY for the right price.

Smoking will just wreck your lungs, not your memory. After I got stuck with stuff like bi-pap machines, etc. I quit smoking ANYTHING! Got myself a magical butter machine and solved that one <G> I also learned something. When you have lung problems - you have lung problems for the rest of your life and there is no going back. I quit over 20 years ago and still have problems from smoking. I tried to quit smoking about 10,000 times and failed. I read all about it. If you can quit for 2 weeks the only other thing you have to beat is the habit which is also not real easy. To do the 2 week thing I went to a doctor and whined about my throat (forget what I said). The doctor peered in and decided that the best thing to do was to take everything out of my throat that isn't really necessary. I still had my tonsils, that thing that hang down from the top of the throat, etc. After that I couldn't eat anything but soup for two weeks and was not interested in smoking either (it was a miserable two weeks but I survived). I know that all sounds a bit insane. On the other side I got smoking under control (no more smoking) and didn't miss the stuff the doctor took out.

I used to have horrible tinnitus, I don't anymore. I quit cigarettes ten years or so ago. Took up hookah for a few years, quit that so I could afford weed.

My lungs are shot, but so is the rest of me. I still bum cigarettes every chance I get. I vape weed so the lung damage is fairly minimal.

Did the tinnitus just go away or did you cause it to go away? If you did something what did you do?

Just discovered this thread. Perhaps I should peruse the board more than I do other than the very first thread. So yeah my lungs are shot too. I used to smoke a s*** load of pot from my mid to late teens into my mid-20s. Grew it too on the Big Island. And it is said that the pot today is so much stronger than it was back then. That is total bullshit… when we used to grow that stuff if you could take two deep hits of it you were pretty amazing. Approaching speechless I might say. Never smoked cigarettes because nicotine would cause a huge allergic action reaction in me. I suppose I should pray to Lono for that. But I loved that Pakalolo back then.

Long story short I developed severe asthma and even to this day I take the Advair to 250-50 discus but it’ll be one or two puffs a day to keep the asthma at bay. Or is it bey?

‘

...at bay.

A couple of months ago the VA decided that I needed hearing aids. So, now I have hearing aids. The strange thing is that I can't tell the difference but am told they are working fine. One thing the hearing aids did help, however, was tinnitus. It cut the noise by at least 50%

Then there is the memory thing. I have come to the conclusion that its not all memory loss but a problem with attention span. The results are the same for both of them. I have found that I can no longer carry multiple subjects at the same time. If, for instance, I am talking about something and somebody brings something up my original subject takes flight. Its not a bad memory is a loss of enough attention. I used to have no problem with 5 or 6 things running at the same time with no problem. No longer...

I have actually and literally had a word on the tip of my tongue and then get mildly interrupted by just about anything and the word takes flight. The frustrating thing about that one is that I actually know that I had the word and THEN lost it.

Same here.
And I was juuuuust about to get cleared for hearing aids by the VA when the Civilian In-house Treatment Initiative shut down, and I got shunted to private sector care. Not sure my CHAMPVA card covers hearing aids in the private sector.

Get your hearing aids "tuned up", my friend, it often takes a couple of return visits before they get it right, and that's the case out in the rest of the world, too. Hearing aid users seldom get the tuneup right the first time.

If your hearing aids don't work change the wax filters...

Mine are near the end of their life and as soon as my house sells I'll be able to afford another pair. Something like $6Gs.

The difference with and without hearing aids is like night and day to me. Nothing like normal hearing...but still like night and day.

I have a weird but similar problem; I think I’d call it “aural focus dysfunction.” So far as I know, my hearing is okay - not great, probably time to be tested, but good enough to follow a conversation.

My problem arises when there are three or more voices overriding each other. It’s as though my brain can’t identify which words go with which sentences, or which speaker.

When I worked, I had a shared office and a lot of meetings,either in the shared officer in meeting rooms. I absolutely could not follow. This, along with some executive-function issues, contributed greatly to my early retirement.

I'm just approaching 70, and my spelling ability has fled the scene. Consonants are fine. It's the vowels that I get confused. But it's not my fault! I can still spell Spanish words perfectly, unless they are Mayan borrow-words. It's the English words that have confusing vowel sounds. I guess this means my executive function and logic are fine, but I no longer remember all the words I had to memorize to spell properly.

I've always had the inability to listen to a single speaker in a crowded room filled with conversations. The only time it matters is when my wife tries talking to me while I'm on the phone. I keep telling her I can't follow either speaker when she does that, but I guess she can't remember that!

I do have scars scattered around my brain, according the MRIs. A few words and names I just can't recall, even though I have so many connections to them I know they exist. I have to Google them when I'm trying to write something with that word. For example, "Natalie Portman". Can't remember her name for more than a few minutes, though I know who she is, remember her films, etc.

Well, we can always hope for this. One of Mose Allison’s later efforts:

The problem you described is, I think, another example of your ability to concentrate. Normally works great for a single subject or person - takes a break if you are trying to do more. I still remember the good old days when I could handle several subjects at once. Between that and speech aphasia ............

My husband nearly died of herpesvirus encephalitis 4 years ago. At 65 he was just barely in door of Medicare (thank god). He was in the hospital for 5 weeks, icu 10 days, 6 days in a comma.

He came out with pretty bad aphasia.
Extensive speech therapy, in which I sat, helped a lot. More importantly I learned from that lovely lady and have done a lot of things at home to help him retrain his brain.

I am beyond grateful. His brain recovered 99% and still going.
Of course he's one of the smartest people I've ever known.
He's a retired CPA. Numbers and reasoning never left him.

Plus his tinnitus seems to have gone away. Go figure.

And I’m so glad he’s doing well.

How does someone become infected?

Had to look that up, never heard of it before.

Nice!!

OMG Olyve...hugs to the both of you...big big hugs.
I've never met you guys but you're such an adorable couple I feel protective of you.

I must have speech aphasia then...the beginning stages.
I forget the most elemental words! Makes no sense!
And worse, I forget names, even names of people I know very well or people I think about a lot.

For instance, don't tell Karen that I've always had a raging crush on Marisa Tomei and Laura San Giacomo.
Pffffftttt, she knows! She has the hots for Sean Connery so we're even.

Today I could not for the life of me remember their names, I swear, I was posting something about movies and the subject of favorite actresses came up.
I am friends with Dale Launer, the guy who WROTE My Cousin Vinny and I had to go to "The Google" and type in My Cousin Vinny and extract Marisa's name from the cast and then I had to go the The Google again and do the same thing for Sex Lies and Videotape.
Thank God Dale didn't jump in or I would be screaming into a towel from embarrassment.

Awww Jeffrey. Thank you. That is so sweet.
You and Karen are favorites of mine too.

Here's to life and good friends!

Rare Deseases

He had type 1.
They don't really know why it went up into his brain.

I rarely admit it, but I have been having word-finding problems myself, for some time now. I have a very extensive vocabulary, and I tend to be very particular about my words. There are subtle differences between them, and I don't like to be imprecise. BUT, I now use a lot more synonyms than I used to, because I can't get the exact right word.

To be honest (something I try to avoid at all costs), I think this goes back to a "mini-stroke" I had about a dozen years ago (at 50). I "fully recovered", in that there are no physical or mental deficits that are detectible on tests. But, ever since then, I have found I forget things, or can't find particular words (or names), or stumble over my tongue in ways that I never did before (especially when I am fatigued), or MISSPELL words I know. It cause me a lot of frustration, even though it is rarely noticeable to others (as far as I know). I also don't know if this is just the vicissitudes of age, or if it is specific to something, but I worry about Alzheimer's and my ability to keep caring for my honey, who has some more significant health and wellness issues than I. One grandmother had severe dementia, and my aunt, who just passed at 92, declined rapidly over the last couple of years. But I'm still 30 years from that!

Tomorrow I have my annual meet with my VA doctor, and I plan on discussing this with him. I wonder, too, about some of these supplements - prevagen, and... uh, forget the name of the other... - that are supposed to help with memory. Maybe there are some cognitive exercises I can do to keep up my mental acuity. I still love sudoku (although frequently mispronounce it), and crossword puzzles.

NWP, I wonder if you might benefit from some speech therapy. There are some similarities between a stroke and encephalitis...fluid on the brain.
There are indeed exercises to help relearn some of those lost words and spelling too.
Gary's stumbles every now again aren't noticeable to other people either. He's learned to find another word or quickly self correct.
For a while he wasn't comfortable interacting with other people especially telephone calls.

Our adorable young speech therapist, Elizabeth, says crosswords and other kinds of puzzles are good exercises for memory.
I'm glad you're discussing it with your doc.

To understand the complexity of memory and its loss, it is necessary to learn a bit about the hippocampus and its very complex structure and functions. This part of the ancient brain is crucial for the acquisition of new memories and transferring them to long term storage, called Long Term Potentiation, LTP

Unfortunately the hippocampus is also subject to many kinds of damage, including Amyloid deposition and atrophy in AD (JGW) exquisite susceptibility to ischemic damage after cardiac arrest, ischemia from stroke,(NWP) and inflammatory damage from herpes encephalitis that usually affects the temporal lobes. (Olyve) All of these conditions can cause various forms of memory loss/dysfunction. I will be adding more images and references to help clarify these. This is a section of hippocampus stained to show neurons from 1886, that show the architectural complexity needed for it's complex functions, and how easy it would be to disrupt them.
https://hekint.org/2019/11/21/staining-the-cells-of-the-nervous-system/

TAT
The Hippocampus in health and disease: An overview


Since hippocampus receives direct inputs from olfactory bulb, it is important that it was implicated in olfaction for a long time.[18] Memory started dominating in early 1970s, with the description of LTP.[19] Anterograde and partial retrograde amnesia developed in a patient called Henry Gustav Molaison (called HM)[20] following removal of hippocampus due to refractory epilepsy. HM was unable to form new episodic memories following this surgery. In medical science, HM has been perhaps the most studied medical patient. Later studies have shown that damage to hippocampus causes anterograde amnesia and often retrograde amnesia also. Implicit memory is spared in hippocampal damage.[20,21]

Hippocampus is one of the unique regions in brain where the neurogenesis[22] continues even in adult life. Though, described initially, as “too little,” neurogenesis in brain is now thought to be functionally important. It has been seen that neurons, hence, produced integrate into the mainstream neurons. They have also, hence, shown to be functionally important. However, a recent review agreed that neurogenesis per se may be less attractive drug target[8] than hippocampal atrophy as a whole.

Hippocampus is now known not just to be important in learning and memory but also in:

Spatial navigation[24]

Emotional behavior[25]

Regulation of hypothalamic functions[27]

Learning and Memory: Hippocampus is vital for learning, memory, and spatial navigation. Connections between hippocampus and neocortex are important for awareness about conscious knowledge.[28] An intricate balance is maintained during encoding of memories in hippocampus and retrieval of experiences from frontal lobe. For learning and memory loop, there are two prominent pathways: polysynaptic and direct pathway. In polysynaptic pathway, hippocampus gets afferent connections from parietal, temporal, and occipital areas via entorhinal cortex and then to dentate gyrus→CA3→ CA1→ subiculum→ alveus→ fimbria→ fornix→ mammillothalamic tract→ anterior thalamus→ posterior cingulated→ retrosplenial cortex. In the direct intra-hippocampal pathway, it gets its input from temporal association cortex through perirhinal and entorhinal area to CA1. From there, projections move via subiculum and entorhinal crtex to inferior temporal cortex, temporal pole, and prefrontal cortex. It is important to remember that polysynaptic pathway is important in semantic memory while direct intra-hippocampal pathway is important in episodic and spatial memory.[28]

Other Roles: Hippocampus is a part of ventral striatal loop, hence can affect motor behavior.[30] Though emotional behavior is regulated mainly by amygdala, hippocampus and amygdala both have reciprocal connections, thus can influence each other (latter affects more than former). Since hippocampus has projections to hypothalamus, thus can affect release of adrenocorticotropic hormones. That is why, in patients with atrophied hippocampus, there is rise of cortisol.[27]

I have developed a denial theory about why those of us with extensive vocabularies, take more time to retrieve a particular specific word. It is very simple, but obvious, that like with computers, it takes longer to search a larger database!
Just the other night I was watching a program where one of Eric Clapton's guitars was gifted. I knew the sequence was coming, but I couldn't remember Clapton's name. Some God! By the time it came to the subject, Clapton had come to me, once I stopped being concerned that I couldn't remember it.

After a memorable excessive dose of some un-prescribed "medication", I thought I had burned out way too many neurons. This was confirmed by losing my coffee cup in the lab multiple times. Then when I made mental notes of where I put down my mug, I lost it even more! It was just a manifestation of my ADHD (that we didnt know about then), made much worse from anxiety about my self induced brain damage!

As you have noticed, THE NOUNS GO FIRST! It is easy to substitute various adjectives and modifiers, but NOUNS, not so much!

There are some words that I can hardly ever remember, and when considered, they were often associated with things or people that had bad associations with their names, and my brain didnt want to go there..

Some word remain purrsistently intractable like uh umm, pause, Anomia!

APHASIA ASSESMENT TOOLS

TAT

Aphasia, what is it?


Aphasia like real-estate is all about specific location. Many conditions can cause damage in different locations in the many areas of the brain involved with speech. Specific lesions in Broca's speech area in the frontal lobe cortex of the dominant hemisphere give syndromes with similarities, but of course vary considerably with the amount of damage. I wonder where my Broca's area is, as my grandfather switched me from a lefty to a righty, so which hemisphere is dominant? I hope I dont find out the hard way. These various aphasia syndromes are well described, and modalities for treating them have been evaluated.
There has been much interest in the unexpected plasticity of neurons to develop work-arounds to damaged areas that restore lost functions. We used to think that recovery of some functions were due to resolution of edema and inflammation, but now we recognize that even old neurons are smarted than we thought and can regenerate or at least re-groove and learn new tricks.

TAT

A follow-up on my previous post. I had my annual physical with my VA doctor, Monday. I asked about the memory issue, and got a referral to mental health. I was on my way home when the MH doc called and asked where I was...

Turns out he had an immediate opening, would I mind coming back? So, I immediately went back. His office was one hallway over from my primary doc.

We had a pleasant session, he took an assessment (ironically, the same one that Trump took, and I confirmed that Trump lied about his results). He assured me that I was doing fine and had no deficits (noting, for example, that I named twice as many animals as was "normal"), which made me feel a lot better.

I have his card and an intention to see him again regarding sleep deprivation and generalized anxiety.

Its now been over two years that I wrote the above. On Dec 28 I am off to the office of Cognitive Issues via the VA. The memory just gets worse and worse. I haven't forgotten the names of my kids, yet, but I can see it coming.

Its interesting. A few months ago I was having a problem with breathing. I went to Outpatient at the Hospital. It went like this. The nurse set me down and started to do a blood pressure test. About 5 minutes in she said; "I'll be back in just about a minute". A couple minutes she came back and said; "I have a wheel chair outside the door. I want you in that chair right now and then you are the way to the emergency room". Seems my heart was going at the incredible speed of 16 per minute. Now its never less than 60.

I was in the emergency room for about 10 minutes before they had an Ambulance. I got a ride down to St Michaels (85mph) around Paulsbo forget the name of the town (and, pretty much, everything else) where they planted something into me (forget what its called, a "heart" something). I am fine now and my heart continues working. It is, I suspect, part of being old.

I have also noted that, when they were peering at me, and asking questions to prove I was alive, etc. I just didn't care. I could listen to them talking and, apparently, I was pretty close to dying and what really amazed me is that I just didn't care! THAT kinda woke me up (then I went back to sleep).

Just thought I would throw that one in.

When I had my heart attack --- same here, I knew I was in deep trouble but a part of me just acted like "Oh well, another day at the office" and I refused to get worked up, even after I saw what my face looked like after it got used to smash the metal dog crate as I fell down.

Its only been a year since I last wrote here. In that year I have had a heart attack and an implant. I also now have speech aphasia (cannot speak a word I know). Basically, things are not getting better and I'm kinda on my way. I have been told that learning to play a musical instrument might help and I'm considering that Irish drum which is pretty neat. I m also taking lession in spanish as that too might help. So far nothing helps and it just keeps on going.

I also do exercises, every morning. I spend an half an hour on a machine that is supposed to be like hiking through the snow. After that I lift a 10lb weight something like 60 times for each arm (means I lift something like 3 tons every week). I have been told that I am in pretty good shape (which may, or may not be true).

My ability to pay attention to something specific over time is mud. My memory is really not all that bad although I do forget stuff. My wife has moved on to trying to mother me which I have seriously fought. She worries when I drive although she is the one that gets tickets and I think I drive just fine. In about 2 weeks I will be 89 years old. All my friends, and my wife now will help me say a word I can't speak with no problem. Its was kinda embarrassing but OK. For instance, I am standing in front of a door and I carrying stuff and can't open the door and can't say the word "door". What I do is say something like; "I need somebody to open that thing in front of me" and somebody will say; "door" and then open it for me. That's become so standard its just the way it is.

I also have COPD dementia (which includes Cognitive impairment) One good thing is that I now understand what 'dementia' means) Apparently I don't have Altzheimers (I have a VA shrink and he told me that I was unlikely to get Altzheimers. I thought I already had it but all of this stuff herein is not, apparently, Altzheimers) None of this stuff is fun but when you consider the alternative .............

Now all this stuff will seem, to many, as a personal hell. On my side I have come to accept what is going on because there is, really, very little one can do to change anything. Hopefully, if anybody old reads this and its just beginning for them it might give them some thought about what is going on instead of the age old solutions of thinking about suicide. It really isn't all that bad as, after a while, one becomes used to whatever.

I get all the help I need and I have both the local hospital and the VA to help me should I need it. I am not rich but I pay all my bills and I have no debt. So, basically, I am fine with problems which are really all that bad (I'm still walking and driving).

I have been living long enough to see a pile of stuff get fixed (I would remind that there is stuff getting fixed EVERY DAY!!). There was the one where you spent the rest of your life in a big, steel, breathing machine. My father died a blind man - I got the same disease (macular degeneration, which seems to run in families. Apparently my two sisters have the beginning) and my retinal doctors cured me (they only stuck needles into an eye a few times). There are all those diseases that I got shots for when I was young (and still get them). When I went to a doctor about being kinda dizzy and they found out my heart was almost working, 16 times a minute, they had me on a table two days later, in another city (Silverdale, where they had St Michael's), fixing my heart and implanting a defibrillator (and learned how they count - "01, 02, 03, 04, 05" etc. When I goto a doctor the first thing I ask if if they have the pill yet, as I assume that there is a lot of work being done on all this stuff I have mentioned, and I have kindofa hope that somebody will figure out how to fix this and that. Even if I don't it helps.

This was kinda interesting to write. I think that it might have actually helped me (I had no idea I would go on so long - apologies) and, hopefully, it wasn't a whining too much.

You're giving me hope, because I'm starting to see signs of COPD cognitive impairment and I am worried about how bad it is going to get.
Right now I have occasional trouble remembering where I put stuff, all kinds of stuff, including important paperwork.

Yes, driving a nice car is one of those things I get an enormous amount of pleasure from and my skills are still damn good and so are my reflexes.
I hope I don't lose any of that anytime soon.

Wow! My problems continue to appear. This one is odd. I just spent about 20 minutes trying to reply. Then I apparently hit the wrong key and it all went away. Have no idea what happened. I can remember a time when something like that might upset me a bit. Now, however, when something like that happens I just shrug it off as there is nothing else to do and I seem to have got to a place where more stuff is simply there and accepted because it IS.

First, if you don't have a digital voice recorder buy one, its cheap and helpful. If you say, hear, or read something of interest take out your recorder and say something about it. Then, even if you have forgotten what it was you will probably remember it when you hear what you recorded. The memory thing is very strange. You may think that you have forgotten something but, if somebody, or your recorder, has a good thought there is a very good chance you WILL REMEMBER! If your recording is not helpful, accept that, delete that, and move on with your life. Hell, sometimes I am doing something and try and remember six words to copy someplace else. I I wanted to remember "copy someplace else". If I haven't recorded the three words odds are I can't remember them. As soon as I hear the recording, however, I will usually remember everything. Just a thought.

I also find that all of us dealing with the VA are doing it differently. I have a single person (for get what they are called but I will, eventually remember, and its not important, I think its something like helper and provider but not sure). Anyway, up here the VA doesn't really have a lot of doctors and things so they will send me to the local hospital/medical place which is fine with me. Most of the time I go there for medical things because its easier for them to deal with my insurance rather than VA. In any case it really makes no difference. The thing that is bothersome is that the VA and the Port Angeles medical folks do not share anything with one another which, sometimes, makes a mess.

What I started, and then lost, is REALLY lost. I have no idea what I said. This is not a memory problem is the problem with sticking with something or remembering such. This is not memory so much as attention span. It took me a long time to understand that one. If I am talking to somebody about something, and somebody else walks up and asks a question or says something, whatever I was thinking about and saying has gone with the wind. That one is something to get used to. I am now, pretty much, not real upset when that happens because one can get used to anything once you discover what happened. I have been to shrinks and helpers now and then but none of them have ever mentioned this one. For a long time this one was something that would upset me. It took me a long time to figure out its a problem in that my brain no longer stores everything and when this happens it was never really there in the first place. I betcha, if you think on it, that its really not that unusual for some brains. I have however, if I think I am talking to somebody and its really important or interesting I try and move to a place where somebody is unlikely to interrupt. Interruption is interesting all on its own. When I think on it I really never had such a problem before the s*** hit the fan. There is a saying; "s*** happens". I started, a couple of years ago, REALLY believing in that one. Stuff happens, nobody is at fault, it just was and get over it.

There was some other stuff but this is it for now. Hope I haven't wasted anybody's time. Just trying to help and talking about this is helpful for me. I can't do it with my wife. If I start she wants terribly to help and has no idea what she is helping with. We get along fine and have been married for 60 some years but one has to be careful, otherwise ..........

She is taking a trip with a daughter next month for which I am grateful. I have been putting on weight and its time to lose some. My plan is simple and it works great but will not work with her here. I just stop eating. After 4 days I am no longer hungry. She will be gone for 3 weeks and that will do the job. I have talked to 3 different doctors about this one. Its REALLY strange. Each of the 3 told me they do exactly the same thing and one must take all vitamins and pills and, other than that, you should be fine. They also told me that I was to tell nobody because that might make trouble for them. Given what my wife thinks (she thinks I will die every time I do it which is rarely) I can only imagine what somebody would think of a doctor that would do such a foolish thing.

I bit of information. Does everybody know that to become a doctor takes about 800,000 dollars. Most of that is a federal loan. Every one of the 3 doctors are REALLY pissed off about those loans. There was a time when gov was charging a bigger charge for the loan than the banks! I had one, a woman heart doctor who was married to a Canadian doctor (he had no loan as Canada takes care of this). They have both moved to Canada and she plans not to pay the loan. They saved up 100,000 to pay on the loan and it didn't even cover the cost of the loan (cannot say the word that represents "the cost of the loan" <sigh>)

Sorry, really gonna stop now!!

There are more and more med folks giving advice. One of the main pieces is to do something like learning to play a musical instrument. That is something I went through when I was young. I remember how piano lessons drove me nuts. I have currently decided to take Spanish lessons from Dualingo (https://www.duolingo.com/) on the net. Its free and seems to help overall. The trick is to simply ignore and skip all offers to sign up for the paying portions if you just want to exercise memory stuff. Have no idea why or how and none of the med people dealing with this have suggested it but I think it helps me a bit. My wife is Spanish and she found out about this and, now, she gives me little simple tests now and then and, so far, I have answered correctly so, perhaps, I am actually almost learning Spanish. Oh, I started this Dualingo thing several years ago and have currently started again. Dualingo remember me and started me where I left off. The skipping the speaking thing was a really bad mistake. As you move on they start with the talking thing which is seriously fail. I can, however, actually read a Spanish newspaper and understand a bit of it. I find that, sometimes, I tend to do really dumb things for absolutely no reason I can figure out. Kinda keeps me on my toes just watching out for personal stupidities. ln the old days I would try and make excuses. I don't do that anymore. I just admit it and move on (s*** happens!).

I think that I might have not mentioned how important 'routine' is when dementia occurs. Setup routines for everything that you do regulary from brushing your teeth to anything else you can think of and do it as soon as you can. If you don't you WILL have problems!!

Please note, I can't remember if I have told anybody here about this one or not. My memory simply stinks. When, for instance, I am deciding what show to watch I have to ask my wife if we have seen it. Luckily, in my list of watched shows, most of those I have seen go away but sometimes..........

I just had a thought. I have noted that there are a LOT of ads for pills that absolutely solve the memory problem. My ongoing solution has been to call the va and ask them if they have a pill that would do that. So far, they don't have the pill. Every time I go in I also ask the question; "Do you have the pill yet?". If its somebody new they will ask what I am talking about. I reply; "The pill to take care of my bad memory". That always gets a smile and a great, big, huge, "NO!" I have been around long enough to see a number of things get solved and I also know that there is a LOT of studying going on of memory problems. That being the case I consider my question fair. So, anybody with memory problems, going to the VA or the doctor should always ask the question; "Do you have the pill yet?" if you get a yes be kind to the rest of us and you will be overwhelmed of thank you's, hand shakes, hugs, etc. In other words you will become the hero of the hour.

OH, my last trip to the VA was to have a picture of my brain taken. Therefore .............. (haven't been told yet what that's all about)

Just one more thought. If you say you got a 'no' and lied for a joke then beware. You will have a very good chance of being scorned, having a good chance of being hurt, maimed, yelled at, as well as the probability of being hit but a sledge hammer, etc. (I was temped to have longer list but something came up)

A lot of these so called memory pills are snake oil.
The efficacy and legitimacy of the claims are often suspect.

For instance, I think the one called "Neuriva" can only claim that it "is THOUGHT to help aid memory" but they cannot say outright that it actually does. The FTC can't take action against them because technically they did not say that it is tested and known to work.

This is why I ask the VA. If there was something they would tell me and if there is no such thing they tell me that too. I see the VA more often then I see a doctor so its easier. I don't expect a 'yes' but its something that would REALLY make me happy if there was something like that. Right now, as far as I can tell, its ALL snake oil. I know several people that have tried this and that and say it helps. Most of them, however, are having the same trouble they were having before they were taking the pill. As far as I am concerned that's ok. Those folks REALLY wanted something to work and convinced themselves of that one. Its kinda sad but I keep my mouth shut as they are also happier. I think of those things as wishful thinking fulfilled.

Again - there is a LOT of work being done on this one and I choose/hope something will eventually come along. Really sick and tired of not being able to say 'door' instead of "that thing in front of me with a handle, etc" (speech aphasia - part of it all) and that, for those who don't understand it all, is just a small part of it all.

I am now, apparently, going to have them take a picture of my brain via the VA. They are checking for something but I have no idea what that might be. Interesting times.....

They also took a picture of my chest. Everything seems ok there. Then there is the head thing. Here is what they found. I have no idea what this one means but they will call me in and tell me the good news. Probably next week. Seems my brain is shrinking (not good). This is, incidentally and how I understand it, part of growing old. I gonna REALLY need the pill!!!:
FINDINGS:
Parenchyma: No intraparenchymal hemorrhage. No evidence of mass, midline shift, or CT findings of acute infarction. Gray-white differentiation is distinct.

Extraaxial Spaces: Increased volume loss when compared to the prior exam from 2017.

Ventricles: Mildly increased volume of the lateral ventricles since 2017.

Sinuses and Orbits: Imaged paranasal sinuses, orbits, and mastoids show no significant abnormality.

Bones: No evidence of fracture or calvarial defect.